The Big Weekend
A Father-Son Ritual for Life’s Milestones
Introducing 'The Big Weekend'
When my son turned 12, I decided it was time for a special father-son tradition—what we call "The Big Weekend." It's a chance to step away from daily life and engage in deep, meaningful conversations about growing up, responsibility, and the future. Our weekend was packed with discussions ranging from puberty and integrity to the traits of a real man and finding a life partner. It was a birthday gift, but also a rite of passage.
The Challenge of Raising Boys Today
In our world of digital overload and conflicting societal messages, guiding a boy through the maze of adolescence is daunting. As parents, Kirsty and I have delved into resources, sought wisdom from experienced parents, and committed to learning from our own parenting journey. Adapting, acknowledging errors, and striving for excellence are crucial as we shape the young men of tomorrow.
The Origin of 'The Big Weekend'
Our inspiration came from Ian Grant’s enlightening books—‘Raising Great Boys’ and ‘Fathers Who Dare Win’. These works, coupled with our principles and convictions, laid the foundation for this family ritual. It's about preparing long before fatherhood, developing a moral compass and worldview influenced by our upbringing and those who raise us.
The Role of a Father
A father's presence, availability, and interest are irreplaceable. It's about shared experiences, challenges, understanding, and above all, respect. Observing my son’s growth, recognizing his unique interests, and appreciating his individual journey is deeply emotional.
Generational Shifts
Times have changed from my own childhood on a farm to my sons' city life and exotic holidays. Today's youth, immersed in social media, often struggle to forge genuine connections and grasp their life's purpose.
Our Big Weekend Adventure
Our time in Waitangi was a balance of education and relaxation. Through shared experiences—swimming, exploring, enjoying ice cream—we discussed life's big topics. The uninterrupted father-son time allowed for an open dialogue and full attention to each other's thoughts and reflections.
Ongoing Conversations
Our discussions weren’t confined to this weekend; they’ve been evolving through everyday interactions over the years. 'The Big Weekend' served as an anchor—a memory to look back on as he grows into the man he's meant to be.
Topics Covered
Here's a snapshot of what we covered and what lies ahead:
Navigating puberty and understanding sex.
Recognizing the depth of relationships, intimacy, love, and respect for women.
Envisioning his future, including dreams, education, and career aspirations.
Identifying reliable mentors and building trust.
Deepening faith and discerning life's purpose.
Resources for the Journey
The drive to our destination gave us the opportunity to listen to 'The Big Weekend' podcast from The Parenting Place, a valuable resource for any parent navigating these crucial conversations (https://parentingplace.nz/).
Your Turn
Whether you're a seasoned dad or new to fatherhood, establishing traditions like 'The Big Weekend' can be transformative for both you and your son. It’s about laying a foundation of trust, wisdom, and a shared vision for the kind of man he aspires to be.
